I have a question for you: What do the Baby Boomers Have to Offer the Millennials and Gen X’s in our society, today? For me, this question reminds me of a great story my Mom used to tell me when I was a young girl. I sincerely believe my quest for seeking wisdom and knowledge stems from my mother and grandfather.
When my mother was a little girl, her father used to say to her, “Little Girlie, I wished I could just tell you all my knowledge and wisdom. But, unfortunately, you are going to have to go out into the world and learn it all for yourself.” Over and over again, my mother repeated this message to me, from my dear grandfather’s words to her.
Now that I am 63, I feel that I have a vast collection of experience, and I look forward to gaining tons more. And now I am reminded of a wonderful teaching my mother has given me. She used to say: “For everything you think you know, in ten years from now, look back and see how much more you know then.” Of course the first time she said that to me was when I was in my late teens – early twenties – back in the days when I thought I knew everything!
Well, I followed her advice, and as my 20’s past I started to reflect back on the last 10 years of my life. Needless to say, it was a real eye-opener, for I was in shock at how much I had learned. Worse yet, I realized how much I did not know that I did not know when I was 10 years younger. And it was my lack of knowledge and wisdom that caused me to make the choices and decisions I probably would not have made, if I had known better. So the joy I have today is, I have lived long enough to have a lot to offer for myself and others.
Just recently I had the opportunity to meet Lisa Orrell, the author of Millennials Incorporated. Since hearing her speak, I have purchased and read her book and I loved it immensely. For, I am a person that has spent most of my life, immersing myself into the study of human dynamics and learning about “what makes people tick.” From her book, I quickly realized that if I want to keep up I must learn more about the younger generations that are rapidly coming up behind me.
And the best part of my discovery is: I am just coming into my prime and I have more to offer now than I ever have. I am just so thankful to be old enough and wise enough, to know it! So now I ask myself, what words of wisdom and encouragement can I pass on to you Boomers that are struggling with the fact: “That the world and the young people are just not like it (they) used to be.”
What can I teach you that will contradict the belief that society defies the youth and abhors the aging? And, sadly the result of this critical mindset is: Many older people feel ignored, disrespected, and even shunned in the workplace and in their personal lives. For many they suffer a sense of confusion and rejection and as a result, they are becoming insecure and fearful. This is a very sad reality and even more, a very sad place to be.
So let’s see what words of encouragement and tips I can give you Boomers, to help you realize your wonderful value and contribution you have to offer to any age:
· View yourself as being the best that you have ever been! Stop worrying about how you think you are being viewed by others. You have now lived long enough to know who you are. Hopefully, you have found your authentic self. You are now comfortable in your skin. So, live the life that brings you great self-respect, pleasure, and dignity. Realize that living through the many chapters and experiences of your life have gifted you offerings that are rich and priceless. See yourself as the rough edged, rugged stone that has gone through the “rock tumbler” of life, and has transformed into a divine, priceless gem. Yes indeed, no matter what your walk in life you carry with you, the “rich makings of you!”
· Nurture the courage and heart to want to age gracefully. We all have a need to belong and be a desirable member of the group. Some of us desire that to the point that we will resort to extreme measures to retain a youthful appearance. But that method for fitting in is only going to delude ourselves. First, we must love ourselves for who we are, right where we are at this time. This simple insight is truly the best recipe for presenting a beautiful personal glow and enlivening your youthfulness. We must embrace our aging with internal joy, comfort, and grace. And our inner peace will certainly enhance our exterior beauty as well.
· Pursue your passions. Give these excited young people something to look forward to when they mature. Illustrate to them that at any age we have tremendous offerings and value. “Walk the talk” that they can model for their own developing and maturing. Your actualized example will accomplish two things: Your active presence will draw interest, attention and even admiration from others of any age. And you will give these young people great hope for their own future, as they mature into their “golden years.”
· Remove negativity from your life. I constantly teach that we only have control of two things in our life: our behavior and our attitude. That is all we can be in charge
of to change the world for ourselves and to influence others. So, foster your own positive behavior and attitude, then, stay focused on helping others. If you struggle with negative self-talk, replace it with affirmations that are positive and desirable. Don’t rely on others to save you, not any longer. Don’t waste time fretting and worrying, and becoming defensive, hostile, even angry, and blaming others for your feat. Instead, look for the lessons learned from your negative experiences and impart this knowledge onto others. Share like a mentor.
· Treat your aging as a natural process that you can go through with acceptance and grace. Experience “joy” in your life; stop seeking “happiness.” To understand joy in the Biblical sense, it is not to be confused with exuberance or with superficial cheerfulness, such as happiness. It is a peaceful quality that can run all through your life, no matter what the various circumstances that can arise. It is staying grounded, centered, and in a state of harmony with the universe – no matter what delights and/or challenges come into your path. Yes, joy is long term contentment.
· Consider the journey of life to be like a long hike crossing through the deep valleys and over the peaks of mountaintops. Yes, there is that great delight from viewing life from the mountaintop. We get that momentary, euphoric high, as in the state of happiness. But it is when we are in the deep dark valleys that we truly face our trials. That is where we do our best soul searching and, as a result, the best lessons are learned and the richest wisdom is gained. It is in the valleys that we get to find out who we really are, not who we are when everything if going just fine.
· Take good care of yourself. Respect the body that God has given you and take good care of it; and keep an active mind so that you will be motivated and a good interest to others. By taking good care of yourself you will definitely gain the respect and trust of the young people, and you will make yourself more appealing to people of all ages.
· Stay up to date with what is going on in the world around you. Pay attention to current events, social concerns, and political and ideological changes. Keep up with topics that matter to young people. Staying abreast to what is going on in our fast evolving world will offer you a strong bridge for building rich connection, and quality relating and interacting with the younger generations.
· By all means: avoid being “self-focused” and telling the younger generations about “the good old days”. Instead, be “other-focused” and be a curious student about what life is like in their “good new days.” Don’t bore them with what you have done. Instead, be curious and admire them for their great qualities, attributes, and contributions that they have to offer our society today. Learn more about them. And, who knows - they may teach you something.
· Best of all - concentrate on being helpful, caring, and a positive, healthy contribution to others. Honor and respect others for their uniqueness and differences. Learn some new practices and behaviors. You are never too old to grow! Some like to say: “When I quit growing I might as well die.” Being other-focused keeps you vital, interesting, and youthful at any age. And this is another great place to plug Lisa’s book, Millennials Incorporated: If you want to expand your horizons and grow with the times, her book is a wonderful, wonderful place to start!
I would love to hear from you if you have comments or any other information you would like to share. We are living in a fast changing world and us Boomers are living longer than any other generation before us. So let’s make our time here count and let’s leave our mark on the world for the short time we are here. We ALL do make a difference!
Monday, November 16, 2009
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Sincere Tips for Your Success in the Workplace by Diane Marie Pinkard
We are living in a time where people are very busy! They are hurrying from here to there and there to here, and back again and again. It almost feels like our civilization is going crazy. And if people do not find a way to slow down and get genuinely connected, first with them themselves, then with each other, I sincerely believe we are going to extinct ourselves.
I sincerely believe that “awareness” is the key for our success and our survival. And the best way to become aware is to be present in the moment. We must pay attention to the “now” and become an observer of our own life. We must become aware of the control our egos want to posses in order to control and run our lives. Instead, we must step outside of ourselves and care about the wellbeing of others. Two heads are better than one.
Yes, we are social creatures by nature. We must encourage collaboration so we can learn to work with others. And there is nothing more exciting and rewarding than genuinely relating and connecting with others. The following list of simple tools is a great resource to print out for you to read from time to time, and, also, to share with others. You might like to enlarge the print and post it in a place that all can see.
· Be what you want others to be with you. Or simply put:
Treat others the way you would like to be treated.
· Acknowledge and be aware of what others are communicating with you - verbally and non-verbally. You were given two ears and one mouth. Use them proportionately!
· Pay attention to body language. Learn to read people’s silent messages of communication. More often their actions are speaking louder than their words. I call this, listening with your third ear.
· Good eye contact is of utmost importance for achieving a rich connection for ALL your exchanges! Maintain good eye contact with your customers when they are talking. Meeting their eye will keep your mind from wandering and will validate their confidence that you care.
· Welcome each other’s views. “None of us is as good as all of us.” This quote comes from Ray Kroc, the founder of McDonald’s. It can be very freeing to respect and honor each other’s differences.
· Show respect for one another. The more attention you pay to understanding one another’s nature, the more harmony you will create for yourself and them. And you will discover how much you have in common. You will be able to successfully share ideas and relate to one another.
· Straight-up, honest communication is the key element for building trust in your relationships and for expressing feelings and concerns, and getting things out into the open. For me, I have experienced that speaking out honestly is the hardest lesson I have had to learn. But, having the courage to master this challenge has been the most freeing and empowering step I have ever taken for living a richer life!
· Communicate effectively. Develop the courage to speak up and speak out. When you speak up, maintain a positive attitude and speak in positive sentences and structure. Nothing paints a better portrait of you, then your gracious ability to speak from an authentic, solid place. You have a right to your opinions if you have an issue. But, if your communication is not working, do not resort to pouting, silence, slamming items down, or sarcasm. Stop, regroup and take a few deep breaths, even acknowledge that you are struggling with your words. Then pull up your boot straps and try again.
· Do not offend others! If you cannot say something nice or pleasant, refrain from saying anything at all. No sarcasm, cynicism, or derogatory remarks! Keep in mind that it’s important to remain respectful of the other person, even if you don’t like their actions. Be patient, interpret, and rephrase thoughts. Read between the lines of what is being said. You can help them by trying to interpret what they mean. A lot of people have a hard time expressing themselves. You can rephrase and repeat what is being said to you, back to those who are speaking. This insures not only that you understand what they are saying, but more importantly, what they mean. And, that you care.
· Know the difference between sympathy and empathy. Sympathy is feeling badly for someone. Empathy includes the quality or process of entering fully, through imagination, into another’s feelings or motives.” In the fullest sense, empathy is putting yourself in someone else’s shoes so that you really understand and feel his pain, fear, or his joys. Practice empathy.
· Listen with heart and caring. Listening is the key. Nothing sooths the heart and warms the soul than being genuinely listened to. The best way to be remembered is not for what you say, but for being a caring listener. Believe me. It works!
· Remember that the goal of effective communication skills should be a mutual understanding and finding a solution that pleases both parties, not “winning” the argument or “being right”. It is a lonely world when you fight to be right. But it is bright and sunny day when all parties get to shine
· Use good diction and volume. Speak clearly and distinctly and loud enough to be heard (but not too loud to overpower those around you). So many are insensitive to how they are relating and affecting others. Step outside of yourself and meta-view these qualities in you. They are so important.
· Use awareness in your workspace. Honor the space of others for noise and distance – not too loud and not too soft. Do not crowd one another (whether standing or sitting) - honor the 18” of personal space. And honor a respectable distance from people working at desks and at work stations.
· Always be thoughtful and courteous of co-workers. See each member of the team to be an important and valuable link in the chain. We are not meant to be “islands” and it unacceptable to isolate individuals for their behaviors, nor their beliefs. Use and practice all of the items addressed in this article and find ways to welcome them, not shun them. See sharing your ideas as a personal effort to relate to theirs.
· Build trust and respect with your teammates. Honest, caring communication is the key. Yes, trust is one of the most difficult characteristics for teammates to develop. And that is because human nature has many idiosyncrasies that confuse and scare people. So many people come from a place of manipulation, poor self-esteem, “hidden agendas,” and “control dramas,” that team members feel insecure and do not know what to think. Let alone how to act.
· If you have an issue with a coworker, discuss your issue in private. Do not exchange any disrespectful words or digs in front of customers or the general public. There is nothing that tears down the value of an individual or the strength of your organization more than exchanging hurtful, derogatory remarks in front of other employees or customers.
· Do not talk negatively about your clients or your coworkers. Have fun with both, but not at anyone’s expense. Be responsible for your behavior and your choices, be accountable for your actions. Nothing poisons the workplace more than a bad seed that is intentionally spreading ill will.
· Keep very accurate, detailed, and complete log sheets on all work and job update forms – like you are telling a story, and chapter by chapter, it is unfolding and evolving. That way, if you are not there another team member can pick up the paperwork and move forward. And no one is burdened with finding the “missing pieces.” Think of it as, you are writing a story! And if you were to never come back, someone else could pick up your work and move forward without hassle. And, please, take pride in this step. Do not look at it as an annoying burden. You are fulfilling such a vital role for keeping the strong train vigorously running on its tracts, with or without you.
I have had such fun putting this list together. I realize that I could go on and on, but I have reached the length I want this article to be. I hope you enjoy it and decide to print it up as a valuable resource for your workplace. And, I would love to hear from you with anything you would like to add.
Thank you! Diane
http://www.heartofsales.com
I sincerely believe that “awareness” is the key for our success and our survival. And the best way to become aware is to be present in the moment. We must pay attention to the “now” and become an observer of our own life. We must become aware of the control our egos want to posses in order to control and run our lives. Instead, we must step outside of ourselves and care about the wellbeing of others. Two heads are better than one.
Yes, we are social creatures by nature. We must encourage collaboration so we can learn to work with others. And there is nothing more exciting and rewarding than genuinely relating and connecting with others. The following list of simple tools is a great resource to print out for you to read from time to time, and, also, to share with others. You might like to enlarge the print and post it in a place that all can see.
· Be what you want others to be with you. Or simply put:
Treat others the way you would like to be treated.
· Acknowledge and be aware of what others are communicating with you - verbally and non-verbally. You were given two ears and one mouth. Use them proportionately!
· Pay attention to body language. Learn to read people’s silent messages of communication. More often their actions are speaking louder than their words. I call this, listening with your third ear.
· Good eye contact is of utmost importance for achieving a rich connection for ALL your exchanges! Maintain good eye contact with your customers when they are talking. Meeting their eye will keep your mind from wandering and will validate their confidence that you care.
· Welcome each other’s views. “None of us is as good as all of us.” This quote comes from Ray Kroc, the founder of McDonald’s. It can be very freeing to respect and honor each other’s differences.
· Show respect for one another. The more attention you pay to understanding one another’s nature, the more harmony you will create for yourself and them. And you will discover how much you have in common. You will be able to successfully share ideas and relate to one another.
· Straight-up, honest communication is the key element for building trust in your relationships and for expressing feelings and concerns, and getting things out into the open. For me, I have experienced that speaking out honestly is the hardest lesson I have had to learn. But, having the courage to master this challenge has been the most freeing and empowering step I have ever taken for living a richer life!
· Communicate effectively. Develop the courage to speak up and speak out. When you speak up, maintain a positive attitude and speak in positive sentences and structure. Nothing paints a better portrait of you, then your gracious ability to speak from an authentic, solid place. You have a right to your opinions if you have an issue. But, if your communication is not working, do not resort to pouting, silence, slamming items down, or sarcasm. Stop, regroup and take a few deep breaths, even acknowledge that you are struggling with your words. Then pull up your boot straps and try again.
· Do not offend others! If you cannot say something nice or pleasant, refrain from saying anything at all. No sarcasm, cynicism, or derogatory remarks! Keep in mind that it’s important to remain respectful of the other person, even if you don’t like their actions. Be patient, interpret, and rephrase thoughts. Read between the lines of what is being said. You can help them by trying to interpret what they mean. A lot of people have a hard time expressing themselves. You can rephrase and repeat what is being said to you, back to those who are speaking. This insures not only that you understand what they are saying, but more importantly, what they mean. And, that you care.
· Know the difference between sympathy and empathy. Sympathy is feeling badly for someone. Empathy includes the quality or process of entering fully, through imagination, into another’s feelings or motives.” In the fullest sense, empathy is putting yourself in someone else’s shoes so that you really understand and feel his pain, fear, or his joys. Practice empathy.
· Listen with heart and caring. Listening is the key. Nothing sooths the heart and warms the soul than being genuinely listened to. The best way to be remembered is not for what you say, but for being a caring listener. Believe me. It works!
· Remember that the goal of effective communication skills should be a mutual understanding and finding a solution that pleases both parties, not “winning” the argument or “being right”. It is a lonely world when you fight to be right. But it is bright and sunny day when all parties get to shine
· Use good diction and volume. Speak clearly and distinctly and loud enough to be heard (but not too loud to overpower those around you). So many are insensitive to how they are relating and affecting others. Step outside of yourself and meta-view these qualities in you. They are so important.
· Use awareness in your workspace. Honor the space of others for noise and distance – not too loud and not too soft. Do not crowd one another (whether standing or sitting) - honor the 18” of personal space. And honor a respectable distance from people working at desks and at work stations.
· Always be thoughtful and courteous of co-workers. See each member of the team to be an important and valuable link in the chain. We are not meant to be “islands” and it unacceptable to isolate individuals for their behaviors, nor their beliefs. Use and practice all of the items addressed in this article and find ways to welcome them, not shun them. See sharing your ideas as a personal effort to relate to theirs.
· Build trust and respect with your teammates. Honest, caring communication is the key. Yes, trust is one of the most difficult characteristics for teammates to develop. And that is because human nature has many idiosyncrasies that confuse and scare people. So many people come from a place of manipulation, poor self-esteem, “hidden agendas,” and “control dramas,” that team members feel insecure and do not know what to think. Let alone how to act.
· If you have an issue with a coworker, discuss your issue in private. Do not exchange any disrespectful words or digs in front of customers or the general public. There is nothing that tears down the value of an individual or the strength of your organization more than exchanging hurtful, derogatory remarks in front of other employees or customers.
· Do not talk negatively about your clients or your coworkers. Have fun with both, but not at anyone’s expense. Be responsible for your behavior and your choices, be accountable for your actions. Nothing poisons the workplace more than a bad seed that is intentionally spreading ill will.
· Keep very accurate, detailed, and complete log sheets on all work and job update forms – like you are telling a story, and chapter by chapter, it is unfolding and evolving. That way, if you are not there another team member can pick up the paperwork and move forward. And no one is burdened with finding the “missing pieces.” Think of it as, you are writing a story! And if you were to never come back, someone else could pick up your work and move forward without hassle. And, please, take pride in this step. Do not look at it as an annoying burden. You are fulfilling such a vital role for keeping the strong train vigorously running on its tracts, with or without you.
I have had such fun putting this list together. I realize that I could go on and on, but I have reached the length I want this article to be. I hope you enjoy it and decide to print it up as a valuable resource for your workplace. And, I would love to hear from you with anything you would like to add.
Thank you! Diane
http://www.heartofsales.com
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